Definition of Family

I define family as a group of people who share a strong bond and support for one another no matter what issues and problems may arise. They provide financial and emotional support for one another and take care of each other in times of need. Family members look after one another in different ways. Parents care for the overall well-being of their child making sure they get the education they need and are healthy. Parents guide their children with life skills that they can use later in life. Siblings look out for one another at school and in other areas that parents might not have access to. They provide emotional support more akin to friendships and mutual understanding through age than a parent would. I think most of the relationships discussed in this chapter fit pretty well with my definition of family. They stress concepts like mutual understanding, respect, cohabitation, and commitment. These are ideals that are important to a healthy family relationship.

Marriage in 50 Years

I think that although marriage has changed over time, there are still some norms that aren’t quite there yet. For example, women were usually homemakers before, tending to the children and household. As the cost of living and times have changed, women now have to both work and tend to the household. In some relationships, the husband does stay at home and care for the children while the woman has a career of her own. I think in the next 50 years, this idea will be more accepted. I think that the norm will perceive either sexes being a homemaker as more acceptable, instead of a preference for one over the other. I think the dynamics involving children will also change to reflect the changes in marriage. Children will probably still prefer certain conversations with one parent over the other, but I think that in general, both parents will be just as likely to talk to their children in any subject area.

Concept from Chapter 12

The concept I chose for this week is Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff. Just like how this concept can relate to healthy friendships, it can also be applied in family relationships. I thought this was a great concept to keep in mind because there are seldom times in our lives where we are able to control every little detail. This dynamic is certainly changed when we are in a large unit like a family. We must be able to see past little frustrations, quirks, habits, etc. that may be annoying to us and look at the bigger picture. Changing family members, like friends or partners, don’t really work. Rather, there should be a mutual understanding that those are habits that won’t likely change. They are our family and we want them in our lives and so that means overlooking minor things we are irritated by. It is also reasonable to think that although family members may do things that frustrate us, there are probably things that we do that frustrate them as well.

Deception

I think that people should be able to naturally be themselves, so I do think it is unethical for people to represent themselves inaccurately. I believe that whether in person or face-to-face, both scenarios hold the same likelihood of deception. Ultimately the decision to lie about who we truly are rests with the individual and not the situation. There are probably different kinds of deception that can happen differently in an online versus a face-to-face situation. For example, in an online scenario, one could exaggerate their physical appearances to seem more attractive to someone. In a face-to-face situation, the other person will be able to see you for who you are physically. As far as introducing yourself and talking about your career, likes, dislikes, etc., both situations can be deceiving. It is only when we get to know someone better will we know what they have been lying to us about. It seems to me that online interactions are easier to manipulate physical appearances than face-to-face, but in both, the truth about who we are besides that is just as easily deceptive.

Commitment and Love

I think younger relationships are more likely to experience love than commitment. I think teenagers in relationships genuinely love in the capacity that they know how, but don’t realize that it takes more than just that to make it work. Relationships are hard work, but I think when you are young, you have this idealized image of what it is supposed to be like. Movies and the media always paint these pictures of fairytales and what “love stories” are like, but in real-life, there requires a high level of commitment for relationships to last. When I was in high school, my relationship involved more love than commitment. I viewed arguments and disagreements as the end of the world, an imperfection in what was supposed to be a flawless relationship. You get tied up in what it is supposed to me and don’t realize that you need to be dedicated and committed to the relationship. I can’t really comment on relationships with commitment but not love from a personal standpoint, but I do think that healthy relationships require a balance of both. Love is the feeling and reward that you get from a person, but relationships also require commitment to navigate all the ups and downs that naturally come with life and relationships.

Concept from Chapter 11

For this week’s discussion, I chose the concept of Navigation, “the process of staying committed and living a life together despite ups and downs, and pleasant and unpleasant surprises” (Wood, p. 286). Within the idea of navigation there exists relational cultures, “a private world of rules, understandings, meanings, and patterns of acting and interpreting that partners create for their relationship” and placemaking, “the process of creating a comfortable personal environment that reflects the values, experiences, and tastes of the couple.” Navigation in relationships is complex and requires the attention of both partners as each person has different needs. When couples encounter tension from relational dialectics, they reevaluate their relationship and make necessary changes. However, the resolution of tensions is never complete, but a continuing process. All couples experience tensions, but those who can navigate better and make revisions are able to stay committed. Relational cultures are unique and different in each couple. No two couples have the exact same settings when it comes to interpretations and emphasis. Placemaking is when couples make a space distinctly theirs by infusing it with objects and indicators of values, preferences, experiences, tastes, etc.